I have a deep, dark secret. And I’m sharing, because maybe one of you have felt this way, too.
I’ve spent my life disappointed. Every night when I lay my head on my pillow, or every morning while I sit in my chair praying…I feel disappointed…in myself.
Not so much in others and their actions, but in myself. Disappointed in my response to others actions, disappointed in my unforgiveness, disappointed in my wrong choices, disappointed in my disobedience. “Why can’t I be more, Lord?” “More loving, more forgiving, more understanding, more compassionate?” “Is this all that I can be? A disappointment to you?”
And then it comes to me…”Have you truly accepted my forgiveness?” “I gave my son for you.” “I love you that much.” “He was pierced on the cross, that you would be forgiven.” “He took on your sin. Your disappointments.” “Each day is new for you.” “All I ask is that you believe.”
“You are not a disappointment to me.”
And now I know…that each night and each morning, He loves me…where I am, who I am, what I’ve done…He loves me. He loves all that I am right now…
And all that I can be.
Blessings to you…