On The Outside Looking In…

I remember the moment well. I walked into the high school gym and scanned the bleachers for a seat. Before me was a sea of faces, most I knew, because in any small town everyone knows everyone, if not personally, well…I knew who their sister was, or I knew that she was the checker at the grocery store. But at the moment, I felt so small…before me was a packed auditorium, and I couldn’t find one place to fit it. Everyone in front of me had groups of family, or friends, and I was on the outside looking in. I was a single mom, with all kinds of superficial  friends, but where did I really fit in?

I’ve felt that feeling again, recently. Although I’m no longer single, and 15 years have passed. I don’t know many people yet in this small town, but I remember that moment, I know this feeling…I am on the outside looking in.

I look into this large group of people who I can see have a warm loving family, I can tell that they are nice people, but I watch from the outside of this group and don’t receive any invites to be a part.  In the place that I’ve gone, being assured that they seek new friendship, not one person is reaching out to me.

Truth is…the shoe has usually been on the other foot.  I have most times been a part of the “inside”.  And now I ask myself the question, “who did I leave out?, who did I not notice?, who needed a friend and I ignored because I wasn’t looking, or even worse because I felt uncomfortable approaching a stranger?” ” Who was the person on the outside seeking to be a part, seeking to connect with someone? ”

Look around.  Do you know of a recently divorced person, a college student away from home, a widower, someone new to your area, a parent with an empty nest?  Do you know someone who has remained single, who has no children?  Do you know of a single mom, a disabled homebound person, a teenager who needs your attention?

People need people.  People need connections.  And there are people all around you just wanting a place to fit in.    All it takes is a handshake, a smile, an invitation-“would you like to join me”.  All it takes is reaching out and showing sincere interest in someone else.

I’m on the “outside looking in”, and I wish that someone on the “inside”, would take the time to look at me and invite me in.  How many people have you left out?

Love and Blessings.

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About 49andcounting

Hi! I'm a mom, wife, grammy, sister, friend at that ALMOST 50 age!! (Okay, since I started this a few years ago...well, add a bit to 49andcounting!) How the heck did I get here so fast?!? I love, love, love- my girls, antiques, rural America, history, Jesus, junkin,the lake and my Big Boy...not particularly in that order. It's about time I change this profile a bit. After a year or living in our 5th wheel in beautiful Pennsylvania, My Big Boy and I are back to the Kansas Prairies. And there's just nothing like "Home Sweet Home". Hitting the Big 50 has its own unique, well...let's say...blessings :) So come along, laugh with me...cry with me...praise God with me...and let's do this 49andcounting thing, together!
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2 Responses to On The Outside Looking In…

  1. Anonymous says:

    Love this! So true from both viewpoints. I feel ya about being outside looking in, I know that feeling all to well. I however have been one to accept new people into the group and try to include them and make them comfortable when I have been the “insider”. Wished you lived closer, we could become our own insider group and welcome others into it!

    • Thanks for you comments. Actually, I was really trying to make both viewpoints. I’m a pretty outgoing gal and am not afraid to join small groups, or introduce myself…so don’t think I’ll have trouble. But has really been a wake up call for me, and for all the times I’ve been on the inside. I will change my ways.

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